I am an autism mom...

With Autism Awareness month slowly coming to an end I though I would do a post that is more of a reflection, rather then just about the events that have been happening in our lives.  Blame all those reflective essays I had to write while I was in school getting my education degree.  All my teacher friends out there can relate :-)

Yesterday Jack's teacher sent home a drawing that Jack did the other day while waiting to be picked up.  It was a picture of a happy face that included dots for the eyes, nose and a line for the mouth.  This was his first (ever) drawing of a face so we were very excited and proud!  What made it even more exciting was that he drew this picture "spontaneously".  I posted a picture of his drawing on facebook and when I was writing the caption for the picture something clicked...I am an autism mom.  This of course is nothing new.   I've know that I am an autism mom for a little while now, but it was the first time that I really felt like being an autism mom is "my life".  It hasn't been a full year yet since Jack got his ASD diagnosis, and even before the official diagnose came he had already been in therapy for a year and a half to address his development and speech delays.  This may sound like a strange epiphany or a delayed revelation, but it was my moment, and I guess it a moment every ASD mom and dad has to have (no matter when it happens).  There are three things so far that I have noticed a difference (in myself) since Jack was diagnosis with autism.  One my vocabulary has increased, I have started to find more friends who also have children on the spectrum and what I view my role as a mother should be.   

Before Jack's diagnosis I would have never used the word spontaneous when explaining a child's drawing.  It was at that moment I started to think of all the new words that have becoming a part of my vocabulary.  Words like Autism, Nero-Typical, spontaneous, prompting, stimming, sensory, scripting, echolalia, joint attention, triggers, hyperlexia, ABA and several more.  If you are have someone close to you who has autism you may be very familiar with the few words I listed.  If not then they might look as foreign to you as they did when I first heard them, but with every new word I learn I know I am becoming better prepared to do what's best for Jack.

Another important part of my life right now is finding other parents who understand, have similar daily struggles and who are also looking for answers to this complex puzzle.  Having an educational background has been helpful when it comes to dealing with the school district, but talking with other people who have been through or are going through a similar experience can give you that feeling that your not alone.  With each passing day I learn something new and/or have a new challenge to face.  Since Jack started therapy at 18 months, I have been doing all I can to educate myself on autism, therapies, strategies, anything that I think might help Jack.  I have learned to mentally keeping track of what things work and don't work, what skills he has mastered and what skills are next for him to learn. I am lucky to have a supportive family and a great group of friends that continues to grow, who have children both on and off the spectrum, and for that I am truly grateful.

I will end with a phrase that I try to always remember when I get overwhelmed: "its a marathon, not a sprint"  Looking ahead at the future can become overwhelming and its important to remember that change doesn't happen over night.  Trying to think about what we will do next year or the year after that can be challenging since we can never be sure how fast or slow his progress will be, which skills he will be able to master and retain, and how much his social skill will have improved.  My journey as an Autism mom has just begun and I know it's a long road ahead.  This may not have been the path I saw myself taking, but it is my path to follow...but at the end of the day I am a parent: I am here to love my children unconditionally, teach them and help them discover their place in the world!

Jack's happy face drawing.